Losing Both Parents Within Three Days

Two Adirondack chairs on a dock overlooking a mountain lake at sunrise
Two Adirondack chairs and warm mugs overlook a misty mountain lake at sunrise.

Losing both parents in just three days is a kind of heartbreak that settles deep in your spirit. It’s a sorrow that changes you, and it reminds you how important it is to cherish every moment with the people you love.

In March 2009, one of my sisters and I flew to Vancouver for our dad’s heart surgery at St. Paul’s Hospital. The night before his operation, another sister called with news that shook us to the core — our mom, who was in a hospital in another province, was very unwell and didn’t have much time left. The weight of those two realities at once was almost too much to take in.

We immediately called our eight siblings so they would have the opportunity to visit Mom while she was still with us. When I phoned our youngest sister, she told me not to call so late — it was just after 11 PM her time — and then she hung up. In her mental state at the time, I don’t think she understood what she was saying. When I told my sister beside me, we both burst out laughing. It was such an unexpected reaction from someone so close to Mom, and that small moment of laughter was exactly what we needed to break the tension.

The next morning, Dad’s surgery went well. The doctors told us their biggest concern wasn’t the operation itself but his nearing congestive heart failure. Once he was stable, we booked the earliest flight back to Alberta to be with our Mom.

I will never forget how Dad cried when he realized we had to leave. Even though my parents had divorced nearly forty years earlier, he still had feelings for her. They had eleven children together — a lifetime of shared history. Seeing his emotion was strangely comforting.

My sister slept most of the way home — on the plane to Edmonton and again for three hours while I drove toward Valleyview Hospital. I was exhausted, and eventually I had to wake her to drive the last hour.

We reached Mom’s bedside around 5 AM. Later that morning, around 9:30, I called Dad to update him. Shortly after that call, Mom passed away.

The next day, two of my sisters phoned Dad to see how he was doing. His voice was already slurred, and he was beginning to retain fluid in his lungs.

While we were planning Mom’s funeral, Dad’s nurse called from Vancouver. She told us that if we wanted to see him, we needed to get there as soon as possible.

I arranged flights and a different sister, and I drove to Edmonton and flew back to Vancouver. We reached the hospital at 9:30 PM. Dad was unconscious, but we stayed with him until 1 AM. Exhausted from two sleepless nights, we found a room across the street from the hospital and rested for a few hours.

About four hours later, Dad’s nurse called us, and we rushed back to the hospital. We were able to talk to him briefly — and then he was gone.

It was one of the hardest weeks of my life. A week that taught me how fragile life is, how quickly everything can shift, and how important it is to hold close the people we love while we still can.

Love That Builds Real Connection

Two people sharing tea beside a colorful flower bouquet and pastries
A sunlit afternoon tea is shared around a table adorned with a colorful flower bouquet and homemade treats.

Love shapes our lives in ways nothing else can. It’s the quiet strength that holds our relationships together and gives them meaning. When love is missing, life can feel scattered, heavy, or even a little empty. But when we choose to embrace love — to show it, to receive it, to let it guide how we treat others — something beautiful happens.

Love softens our interactions. It deepens our conversations. It helps us see people with kinder eyes and a gentler heart.

When we lead with love, our connections become real. They grow roots. They feel safe. They feel warm. And they remind us that we were never meant to walk through life alone — we were meant to walk together, supported by the steady, healing power of love.

Choosing love isn’t always easy, but it is always worth it because love turns ordinary relationships into meaningful ones and simple moments into lasting memories.

Where My Spirit Finally Lets Go

Woman in yellow dress standing barefoot on a coastal trail at sunset
A woman embraces a peaceful sunset moment along a rugged coastal trail.

There are places where my whole being exhales — where peace doesn’t have to be chased, because it gently finds me.

I truly relax in moments like these:

Walking in Mother Nature, feeling sunshine warming my skin or light rain softly tapping against my shoulders. Whether the sky is sunny or misty, nature’s quiet rhythm helps me relax.

Sitting on the sand by a lake or the ocean, listening to the water’s soft, steady sound. The shoreline always smooths out my thoughts, eases my worries, and reminds me that calm is never far away. 

Driving through the mountains, watching the peaks rise like ancient guardians. The winding roads, the deep forests, and the endless sky help me rise above the stress and mental clutter that usually fills my day. 

These simple places restore me. They ground me. They remind me that rest is not something I earn — it’s something I’m allowed to receive.

Every time I return to these spaces, I feel myself coming home.

Growing Through Life’s Hard Moments

Wooden footbridge crossing a rocky alpine stream beneath snow-capped mountains
A rustic footbridge crosses a clear mountain stream beneath dramatic snow-capped alpine peaks.

Moving through failure is an important part of finding our way. Each setback has taught me a small but meaningful lesson. Every experience has shown me what doesn’t work, quietly guiding me toward growth, clarity, and a better understanding of myself. 

I remember how exciting it felt to become an adult with big dreams. But, like many people, I soon faced challenges I didn’t expect. In those hard moments, when hope felt far away, I learned important lessons. Each mistake helped me slow down, think about what happened, and see what I could do better next time. 

When I look back at those early struggles, I can see how much they shaped my path. Every challenge helped me grow and prepared me for future success. Each setback taught me to be stronger and gently guided me toward a better direction. 

It’s amazing how obstacles can help us grow and understand ourselves better. They truly make us stronger and more ready for whatever comes next!

Finding Peace Through Faith in God

Alpine valley with village, winding river, lake, and snow-capped mountains
A winding river, mountain village, and reflective lake glow beneath snow-capped peaks at sunset.

In 1972, I began my journey of faith, and it led me to embrace Christianity.

In 1973, I was baptized. I find comfort in believing that when my life here ends, I will enter a place of peace. That hope helps me appreciate my blessings and stay grounded.

I’m grateful for every moment and for the love and grace that guide my life. I believe that love is real, and it has shaped me in a meaningful way. 

I’m comforted knowing that when my time on Earth ends, I will be reunited with Him. That promise brings me peace as I reflect on my many blessings. I am grateful for every moment. Praise God for His endless love and grace.

I know He is real, and His love touches my life in a personal way. I want you to feel that truth in your heart. He loves you just as deeply, no matter who you are or what you’ve been through.

God’s love is steady, and it welcomes you just as you are. Whatever challenges you face, you don’t have to walk through them alone. Life has ups and downs, and I’ve learned that I’m supported through it all. Knowing I’m not alone brings me comfort.

Getting to know God has changed my life. It has brought me peace and purpose. You can experience that same peace. You are not alone, and there are gentle ways to grow, learn, and build a deeper connection with Him.

Healing Through Wisdom and Growth 

Rowboat and dock on a calm lake at sunset with forested hills
Take time to relax on a calm lake as the setting sun reflects across the water.

Emotional abuse tries to shrink your world. It tells you that you cannot grow or change. But God speaks a different truth—a truth of renewal, strength, and healing. Learning is one of the ways God lifts you back up.

Emotional abuse weakens your confidence and wears down your worth. It makes each day feel heavier than it should. But God restores what abuse tried to steal, and learning becomes one of the ways He strengthens you again. 

Learning is not just about gaining knowledge; it is about discovering your true self. You overcome fear, confusion, and self‑doubt. And God reshapes your identity with truth, not lies.

Every new insight helps you heal and strengthens your spirit. Each skill you learn rebuilds your confidence. Learning reminds you that you are capable, growing, and loved.

Promise yourself to keep learning for your own growth, not to impress anyone. Use this time to discover something new and inspiring that helps you improve. 

God wants you to grow and thrive, leaving behind past hurts. Lifelong learning is a way to embrace the brighter path He has for you.

Learning strengthens every part of your life. It gives you confidence as a parent, friend, leader, and survivor. It helps you face situations with calm instead of fear. It lightens your burdens by sharpening your understanding and your resilience against emotional abuse.

Embrace lifelong learning. Stay open-minded, willing, and let your spirit grow. This journey is about more than just knowledge; it’s about healing, reclaiming your strength, and fulfilling the life you are meant to live.

Choose To Be Happy

Rowboat and dock on a calm lake at sunset with forested hills
When God’s light finds its way in, hope begins to grow again — quietly, gently, and just for you.

Choosing happiness is a quiet act of faith. Even in hard seasons, God can lift your spirit and guide you toward peace. One small step, one gentle thought, one whispered prayer — that’s where your strength begins.

Some days will feel heavier than others. That’s real. Healing doesn’t happen all at once. But you can slowly train your mind to look for the good each day. Even small moments of hope matter.

Each morning, tell yourself something simple and true: This is a good day. I have reasons to be happy. I have a future worth looking forward to.

Maybe you’re grateful for your family. Maybe you’re thankful for your health. Maybe you’re simply proud that you’re still here, still trying, still reaching for a better life. That is joy beginning to grow. That is strength.

Choose to be happy in the tiny details you notice — a warm drink, a quiet breath, a safe thought. These small choices build emotional and mental strength over time. You are capable of this. You can do this.

Do not allow your abuser to take your inner power. Even if you hold your strength quietly in your mind, it is still yours. It cannot be taken from you.

Right now, your focus needs to shift gently toward your emotional and mental health. Not in a dramatic way — just steady, simple steps. Let your heart rest on the idea of finding happiness again. Wherever you are today, begin gathering your strength.

Happiness is a choice. I learned this slowly, and I know it is true. You can decide to enjoy your life again. Even if you can only choose happiness in your thoughts for now, that is still a beginning.

As your emotional, mental, and physical strength return, peace becomes easier to find. You deserve that peace. You deserve safety. You deserve joy.

Planning a safe way out can take time, and there is no shame in that. But please remember — there are always people who will help you leave an abusive situation. You do not have to carry this burden alone.

God sees your strength, even on the days you don’t feel it. Keep choosing the small steps — they will lead you toward peace.

Start Fresh:  Embrace Each New Day

Woman in yellow dress standing barefoot on a coastal trail at sunset
A New Beginning, Every Morning

Every morning arrives quietly, offering a chance to begin again. For anyone who has lived through years of domestic abuse, the idea of a fresh start can feel distant — even impossible. But each new day truly does hold space for healing. You don’t have to carry yesterday’s pain into today. You can set it down, even briefly, and let your spirit breathe.

Your Life, Your Canvas

A new day is like a clean canvas. You may not feel ready to paint bold colours yet, and that’s okay. Healing doesn’t demand perfection or speed. Even the smallest brushstroke — a gentle thought, a hopeful whisper, a single step toward reclaiming your life — is part of creating a future that belongs to you.

The Promise in Each Sunrise

Each sunrise brings a new chapter, one not defined by what you endured, but by the strength you carry now. You have already survived so much. You have already proven your courage. And every morning gives you another chance to move toward peace, safety, and the life you deserve.

You Don’t Have to Rush

You don’t need to have everything figured out. You don’t need to transform your life overnight. Just let today be a reminder that your story is still unfolding — and you have the right to shape it with hope, dignity, and freedom.

A Fresh Start Is Here

A new beginning isn’t a distant dream. It’s right here, offered to you with every dawn. You are allowed to start fresh. You are allowed to heal. You are allowed to build a life that feels safe, gentle, and beautifully yours.

A Quiet Moment of Joy

Woman in yellow dress standing barefoot on a coastal trail at sunset
A woman embraces a peaceful sunset moment along a rugged coastal trail.

Today, I’m choosing something beautifully simple — a moment of joy.

At 72, I’ve learned that peace isn’t something you chase; it’s something you allow. It arrives softly, like sunlight slipping through the curtains, or the way a warm cup of tea settles your spirit.

After years of struggle and surviving what tried to break me, I’ve discovered a truth I hold close: freedom feels like breathing for the first time. And every day, I get to breathe again.

So this little post is just a reminder — for you, for me, for anyone who wanders onto Relax – Take a Break — that it’s okay to pause. It’s okay to smile at something small. It’s okay to enjoy the life you’ve fought so hard to reclaim.

Take a moment today. Let it be yours. Let it be gentle. Let it be enough.

When Truth Finally Reveals What You’ve Been Living

Woman drinking coffee on terrace overlooking a garden and coastline
A woman enjoys coffee on a flower-filled terrace overlooking a lush garden and blue coastline.

There comes a moment — quiet, unsettling, and honest — when you finally see that what you’ve been calling “love” has slowly become control. Domestic abuse doesn’t always begin with bruises. Sometimes it begins with silence, with fear, with the feeling that your voice no longer belongs to you. Naming the truth is the first step toward reclaiming your peace.

Understanding Domestic Abuse

Many people think domestic abuse only means physical violence. But abuse is any pattern of behaviour meant to control, dominate, or silence another person. It is rooted in power, not love. An abuser uses fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to keep you small, dependent, and unsure of yourself.

Domestic abuse can happen to anyone. It affects people of every age, background, income level, and type of relationship.  While women are more often harmed, men also experience emotional and verbal abuse. Abuse is never acceptable — not from a partner, spouse, teenager, or older adult. Every person deserves to feel valued, respected, and safe.

The Hidden Damage of Abuse

Abuse often begins quietly — a harsh comment, a threat, a verbal attack. Over time, it can escalate into physical violence. And while physical injuries are easier to see, the emotional and psychological wounds can be just as deep, sometimes deeper.

Emotional abuse slowly erodes your confidence, your sense of worth, and your ability to trust your own voice. It can lead to anxiety, depression, and a painful sense of isolation. No one should have to carry this kind of suffering alone. Recognizing that your relationship is abusive is the first step toward reclaiming your peace.

Recognizing the Signs

If you or someone you care about may be in an abusive relationship, it’s important to understand the signs — whether the abuse is physical, emotional, sexual, verbal, or financial. Awareness opens the door to safety, support, and healing.

Domestic abuse is always about control. It can appear in any marriage or intimate relationship where one partner seeks to dominate the other. An abuser does not play fair. They use fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under their thumb.

Abuse does not discriminate. It happens in heterosexual relationships and same‑sex partnerships. It affects people of all ages, backgrounds, and financial situations. And while women are more often victimized, men also experience emotional and verbal abuse. The truth remains: abusive behaviour is never acceptable. You deserve to feel safe, respected, and valued.

Abuse often escalates from threats and verbal assaults to physical violence. And while physical injury may be the most visible danger, the emotional and psychological consequences can be just as severe. Emotional abuse can destroy your self‑worth, lead to anxiety and depression, and make you feel helpless and alone. No one should have to endure this kind of pain — and recognizing the abuse is the first step toward breaking free.

If you or someone you love may be experiencing abuse, learning the signs is a powerful beginning. It is the doorway to help, safety, and healing.

A Gentle Closing Reflection

If you are reading this and something inside you feels unsettled, listen to that feeling. It is your inner voice — the one that has been quiet for too long — reminding you that you deserve peace. You deserve gentleness. You deserve a life where love does not hurt.

Awareness is not weakness. It is awakening. And awakening is the beginning of freedom.